O human! How brutal thou !!!

Sunday morning and I was sitting in a restaurant for my breakfast with a copy of The Hindu in my hands. Nothing special in the papers except some news on elections and some accidents in the local area. However one article that caught my attention was on bears and what sort of cruelty they have to face at the hands of the poachers. Honestly! after reading that, i felt as though all hell broke upon me.

To trap a baby bear, the poachers surround the den with burning twigs , after the mother bear goes out to forage the food. Often they will kill the mother bear and then trap the baby bear, which would hardly be weighing 250 grams. Next, after putting these cubs in a gunnybag, they are sold to bear-tamers, called kalandhars.

From here the next chapter of mercilessness begins...

To control the baby cubs, iron rods are pierced through their noses and then metal rings are passed through them. The bears are then made to learn dancing by beating their feet with sticks, to force them to lift their feet. Often burning pieces of coal are placed under a metal plate and the bear, unable to bear the heat, lifts their feet. At the same time, a dholak or damru is played in time to the lifting of the beer's feet. When the bear tries to rest, the trainer would pull the rope tied to the metal ring in its nose and the bear, to avoid this excruciating pain, would stand on its hind legs.

The living conditions are so pathetic for these poor creatures that it just burns my heart. They are often untreated and neglected. Unable to walk due to the pain in their feet, the open and infected sores in their nostrils and meagre food they receive (which mainly consists of ragi balls) becomes their life. As the bears grow up, their canine teeth are knocked out, claws cut and the male bears castrated with razor blades, all this without the use of any anesthesia, ensuring that the bears have no other choice than to obey their masters.

These poor creatures live in the same world as we do. But their pain and misery, often go unheard. Many wild-life organisations are trying recover these bears, but still the current recovery is very little.

During the recovery process, many wildlife organisations pay around Rs. 50,000 to these kalandhars to give these bears to them. Then they are put in quiet quarantine and fed with nutritious diets to ensure they gain their lost weight. The bears are allowed to roam freely in this closed controlled enclosures to ensure they can get back to the nature. Once they settle down they are injected with anesthesia using blow-pipes, and then checked for infectious diseases. The nose rings are removed, the painful mouths, wounds, rotting tooth stumps, etc are treated and a small microchip is embedded in them to monitor their health.

Once the bears have put on weight and their recovery started, they are placed into 'socialising enclosures' where they are free to roam about in open spaces, make friends with other bears and socialise. Food is generally hidden in bamboo pipes, like honey and dates, which the bear loves. The bears learn to discover these treats. Sometimes, the food is also hidden in 'artificial trees' and the bear learns to shake them and find them. Toys made out of bamboo, rubber tyres, etc help these curious animals to regain their natural instincts.

Certainly, one finds the account to be heart-rendering and one can't forgive the poachers, who were the real culprit of seperating the baby cubs from their mother. The law awards them a minimum two years of punishment for this inhuman conduct.

Even though the number of bears still out on Indian streets is pretty high, yet the encouraging news is that out the estimated such 700-1200 bears, nearly 370 bears have been rescued and are safe at various wild-life sancturies at Agra, Bhopal and Banerghatta (courtesy, The Hindu)

Saat Phere... Bullshit?

Sometimes, i think of the meaning of marriage, relationship, commitment, love, etc and some of the thoughts that surround my mind. People always tell me that they would prefer to love or engage in any sort of relationship, only after marriage. That makes me think, what is so powerful in a marriage that binds people? What is in those 'saat phere' which gives men and women the legal right to love and engage in relationship. Come to think of it, it is only a fire around which both of you revolve for seven times. Other than satisfying the traditions, does it hold any true value? People get married even in courts just by a mere signature.. So what makes 'saat phere' so special.

I know that my readers will have varied answers here, but my opinion is that those 'saat phere' actually holds very little meaning. Please don't jump to any conclusions before reading ahead....

True marriage or for that matter true love comes from the heart, which no fire can create. I've seen so many couples, who can be assumed to be married because their love was so strong and pure that it didn't need anyone's attestation. On the other hand, people who got married either through love marriages or arranged marriages, got divorced later, because their hearts never were one. Hence, I really find it hard to believe that saat phere is essential. Maybe, to satiate the traditions, to satisfy the laws of the country, you might need to do this formality, but i view it just as a formality.

When your hearts are so pure and strong, and offcourse one! you don't require any authentication from anyone to say that you are married. Marriage is nothing but a union of hearts and souls and that comes when you feel that you're one. Maybe the physical nature of these formalities might pose some kind of substance to keep you feeling being together, but then again, it is just a kind of mental force only and that can be created when you yourself feel the responsibility of your mate and the feeling that you are not two, but infact one!!

Maybe, mortals aren't so strong to define what could be true love and that is why they need something to bind them together, the 'saat phere', an apparent bond, but holds practical, only till you feel its significance.

I know my ideology might be very unique and unacceptable to many people.... but i would surely love to hear your comments.

Regards,
Gaurav Mittal

In the company of women

I have had a lot of interaction with the members of the opposite sex and in one sense, i am really mystified. The more I came to know about them, the more i was amazed at their persona. I have come in touch with a number of women, some of them are just girls while others have had a great experience of life. An account of what they face right from their childhood to all the way to their old age, is quite interesting to note.

I know that the masculine gender might feel a bit jealous to read this extolled account, but in some ways, they do have to go through a lot more in their life. Just thinking the way from having to cope up with their regular health cycles, their emotional periods, to all the way up to making another human being in them for nine straight month to managing family and taking care of every person in the family, really makes them special. The way they face all the problems of life, yet have a shining face all throughout. The way they hide all their emotions, yet are full of it really makes them very mysterious! Needless to say that, probably God was also amazed at such a creation.

As a matter of fact, some women I have met have been a real-life inspiration for me. I have a very good friend named 'S'. S had a really tough life right from the starting. She was in love with a guy, but unfortunately, destiny was against her and she had to get married to someone else. Her married life wasn't good and she had to face all its travails. After five miserable years, she opted for divorce with a son. Even after that, she has been through a number of ups and downs, losing people she loved and not getting back love in return. Not to mention the enormous amount of mental trauma she and her family had to face. Still today, whenever i talk to her, i see that same glorified smile in her as though she is totally content with her life. Perhaps she never blames anyone for her misfortunes and continues to live her life with incessant happiness. People like 'S' are really capable of defining the true meaning of life, i.e. Life is short, so why ever be unhappy. Smile, enjoy and make merry.

Then there is this another girl i know, 'A'. This girl really loved my friend but had to leave him because of her parent's wishes. She tried, protested but was never successful. She could have opted to run away with him and have everything what she desired, but she kept her parents' will, happiness and honour in the society before her love. Sometimes, i feel her acts were mean, but then, the truth is that it takes a lot of courage to do something like this. It really takes more than just guts to rip your heart right out and kill all that happiness and i bow to thee.

Come to think of my mom, and how she has faced her problems throughout life and yet been together with the family and taken care of us very well, really makes me love this great woman even more!

I know that guys are nonetheless not weak in any aspect, yet experience has proved it that girls are emotionally very strong in all the matters of life. How they do it, whether they have any secret formula for it, is really beyond my comprehension. But I would re-iterate that they're truely HIS masterpiece. They have their involvement right from their childhood as a sister or friends to being someone's wife one day and then as a mother and grand mother, moulding and nurturing the world in their bosom. I think whoever said it, made a very true statement that "Behind every man's success, there is a woman"

Ladies............ To thou, I salute !! :)

Yeh Shaadi Nahi Ho Sakti..

We live in the 22nd century, man has gone to the moon, there is inter-mixing of cultures, we have become modern and trendy by the day, yet if we look around we still see some practices being followed around us, which show how rigid and backward we still are in our thinking. In the recent past, one of this incident happened with my friend.

This guy was incredibly in love with a girl and the girl also loved him a lot. Both were very happy, had seen so many future plans, but fate had something else stored for them. As ill-luck would have it, one day the girl's parents came to know about the affair. She was severly reprimanded and went through a high mental agony. Even my friend was in a miserable state. The reason being, that the girl's father is an orthodox hindu brahmin who doesn't believe in love marriages and plans to get the girl married according to his wishes to a hindu brahmin only. This came as a severe shock to me. Both the guy and the girl were very well suited for each, understood and cared for each and I can say it with a lot of confidence, that if they had managed to become a couple, they would surely have had a great married life.

However, what fails to get acknowledged here is the attitude of the girl's father. I just do not understand what would he ever achieve in getting the girl married to someone whom she doesn't love, or would such an alliance assure that the girl would get the same love as that with my friend? Is it really necessary to get married in one's caste? Does it provide some sort of social and emotional security or something which my friend couldn't provide? Was the girl's father right in putting his needs before his daughter's?

I really fail to answer these hounding questions and they leave me absolutely clueless !!!!

What has really happened to us? Why are we still hell bent on the age old traditions which hold absolutely no meaning? Why can't we open our minds to just a little bit and explore the world outside? No.... we don't do that.... Why? Because thay say that, that has been the practice in my family for generations and hence I refuse to change myself with time.

At times, we become such hypocrites that we fail to realise the big difference between we do and what we say? We would take the lord's name day-in and day-out. Chant 'Hare Krishna, Hare Rama' with every breath, but forget their deeds.
Lord Krishna and Radha's sacred love has been bowed upon by the entire world. We bow and pray to thee. Sita Mata selected her life partner through a swayamvar (gathering in which the bride chooses the most eligble match for herself amongst a number of potential candidates)

We know all this. We have been teaching all these epics to our children and great grandchildren in the form of sacred texts, yet when it comes to us, we still choose a non-sensical approach. I would like to ask the readers one simple question? What is the difference between an educated girl and an illitrate one if she doesn't even have the freedom to choose her life partner? What is the difference if she is being merely tethered from one hook (her parent's house) to another hook (her future home) against her wishes?

Frankly speaking, i am clueless here....

In today's world, it is very rare to find love. People just aren't that committed and even if such a falling off happens, they easily make a transition to a new partner. Even if you forget about pre-marital affairs, for a moment, how many people in a marriage, are actually committed to their spouse? So who gives the guarantee that an arranged marriage within one's own community or caste can enforce such a commitment.

Either we are too naive or just prefer to keep our eyes closed, despite knowing all this; and what about the more modern, educated ones? The girl just preferred to go alongwith her parents wishes without even talking properly to her parents, despite being so educated, despite knowing that what she is doing is wrong. But she is a girl, perhaps her will power doesn't allow her to talk back to her parents. As a matter of the fact, she was so scared of her parents, she never even talked to the guy properly... !!

If you ask me, the advocates of caste-based marriage are a bunch of selfish people, who blindly follow what everyone else follows. They do not love their children and are selfish enough to kill their child's likes for the sake of their own, just to show their fake pride and honour; and those who just go alongwith this baloney have no right to call themselves as educated.

However, i do pray to God to bless them both with peace and comfort in their minds and a happy future for both of them.....

p.s. To see what others feel and their comments on the topic, please click here

Regards,
Gaurav Mittal

The real meaning of Entrepreneur

Everyone of us have big dreams for the future. We want a high place in the society, lots of respect, few million bucks and worldy comforts. Many of us also wish to open our own enterprise and make our mark in the society. Whenever i look at the list of the richest men in India, i am awed to see the crores of rupees they've made. Infact, altogether if i add their wealth, it is more than enough to wipe out poverty from India. Yet, i see that in this country, one man owns dozens of cars, whilst other can barely travel in buses. One stays in big mansions whilst other stays on footpath.

With a growth rate of over 8% it is amazing to find such a vast difference. The question which arises here is that why is India having such a haphazard economic condition when the growth rate is excellent? I feel that the main reason for this is that we just concentrate on earning bucks, without caring much for the development around us. So it finally settles down to this.. Who and what exactly is the role of the entrepreneur? Does entrepreneurship just entitles him to earn money and enjoy his life? Doesn't he have any moral duty towards his society and his country?

I've seen many exceptions, however. People like Tatas and Murthys have offered to make a difference. They've made an effort to change the face of the society by opening many charitable institutions for the upliftment of the poor and the needy. For instance, 'Infosys Foundation' headed by Mrs. Sudha Murthy is actively working for the cause of the poor and helpless. The Tatas legacy has even been greater. Right from Jamshedji Tata to Shri Ratan Tata, they have worked for their country on a great moral scale. Ratan Tata has opened up many schools and given employment opportunities in the tribal areas of Bihar so that these backward areas can come up and their standard of living can improve.

Aren't these great men? They are !!
Aren't they rich? Yes, they are !!

This leaves a very powerful lesson for all the budding entrepreneurs of tomorrow. It teaches us the real meaning of an entrepreneur, one who has the power, one who is mighty enough to make a difference.. The one who can lift the face of our country to a very powerful democracy and wipe out poverty.

A thought !!

I constantly think about things as and when they happen. So once a thought stuck me and I was wondering about it, whether this thing happens in reality??

Sometime back i had seen this SRK block buster Paheli, in which SRK plays a double role of a dedicated husband as well as a ghost. The character of his wife is played by Rani Mukherjee. As the story unfolds, SRK has to leave his wife for a business trip. His wife feels lonely and desperate without him and when she is approached by a ghost (SRK in double role), after much hesitation she accepts his love and even goes to the extent of fornication, knowing very well that her husband is pretty much alive and caring.

While its very much true, that a husband needs to take care of all the emotional and physical needs of his wife, such story-lines potray a very bad image in the minds of the Indian viewers disrupting the chastity of Indian women. Can women become so adulterous for the want of bodily needs that they commit deceit? Does the hunger for sex becomes so strong for them, that they can't wait for their loving and caring husband to return?

I, as a guy, can't answer these questions properly but i feel that the image which media potrays in this regard is incorrect. Indian women are supposed to be the symbol of tangible purity, and such depiction merely downgrades their status in society. Pure and high thoughts are influenced by our surroundings but when young people see this false picture of the Indian women, they get a wrong image that the moment the men step out of their homes, their women will indulge in extra-marital affairs. Hence, even though unintentional, media brings about a feeling of salient crisis in the minds of young people.

The image of the women should be shown with utmost respect and dignity and whatever content is being shown should be carefully thought of, because media is the most powerful medium affecting the minds and actions of millions of people across the country.

However, as I have said, that, me being a guy can't really answer this question absolutely correctly, so i request for your comments, esp from the ladies, as to what do they feel about this issue.

Destiny...

Man is constantly hounded by questions, which he can't answer, at times. At times, you are on on the top of the world... You feel that the world is your oyster, and then at the next moment, you are at the rock bottom, totally devasted, shattered beyond myth. The transition is accompanied by tremendous mental and physical trauma. You are being shot at by questions, whose answers you don't know. Pressure trains circle your mind like a whirlpool constantly trying to sweep you off you normal mental balance and it is possible that you reach a stage of partial or total madness.

So what does one do about it. There are numerous situations we face such mind-boggling, life threatening circumstances, whether it be work-related, relationships, or health. No one knows what is going to happen next !! How do normal human beings cope up with this problem? We go through so much mental agony, that we are unable to maintain a decent mindset and tackle these problems.

Some people try to just run away from them... and leave the situation on to fate, hoping that some answer might come into picture. But, the fact is, it is not just about the answer. It is about the mind, which brings the answers. Until it is in actual working condition, you can't natually think of any solutions. So turning hostile towards your friends, showing off or rather throwing off tantrums is pretty common.

Say a person who has just been fired from him job, or a guy who has been dumped by his girlfriend (or vice versa) or a person who is suffering from some or the other health problem, is just so much hammered, that either he takes up vandalism or becomes a threat to his/her ex.

Even I am going through one such problem in the current days, and i gave a lot of thought to it, talked to a couple of my friends. I realised that there is something which we tend to forget during this hour of crisis.... which is DESTINY

I know there would be many non-believers here, but I truely believe that there is some power, above all of us, which controls what we go through in our normal life cycle. There is this power which decides what we must achieve or lose.

I believe that everything happens for a reason and that power decides that for us. No one can be stronger than our own destiny. Almost all of us believe in God here. We chant his name, day-in and day-out, talk of so many mythological stories displaying his prowess, but do we really trust him or accept his decisions at these times of crisis. Everyone would happily do that when we get some gift, but, at the same time, everyone of us starts to complain the moment some difficult time is upon us.

Why do we forget that HE is still there with us, even when everyone has left?

People may come and people will go, but HE shall be the 'one' who shall always be there, the one who controls us, our actions, the guiding force amongst us... the one which we call 'Destiny'

Easier said than done! It is these testing times, which actually show how much we believe in God, or our destiny or how much are we ready to accept our fate. I have seen so many people, even some of the age of my parents, who have gone through so much, that they have stopped believing in God, altogether. They might chant his name the whole day, yet their belief isn't firm.

I am no saint, or a preacher. I just write what I feel and my belief is so strong, that it knows, that this is just a tough time for me and soon it would be over for something still better in life. However, what do these tough times teach is rather important.

They teach us to hold our beliefs strong. They teach us to believe in HIM without a doubt. They teach us to be strong during calamity and just believe in him.... The 'Almighty'. They teach us that the ultimate thing that stands out is 'DESTINY' and nothing is greater than that.

If something is meant for you, you shall have it in the end... Have faith, believe in your destiny!

Amazing Links : N.B.

Hi folks,
Since i was receiving a lot of requests for the CAT material, i have uploaded whatever I had on ManagementParadise.com

You can access it by clicking here

There are various sections there and you can go to the CAT section and browse through the various sections there. You would get a lot of mock papers, papers for CAT and other entrance exams, and many other useful materials to aid your preparation. If u need notes on GD or PI, we have sections for that too.

You would need to register on Management Paradise (MP) and that can be done by accessing the following link Register on ManagementParadise

I hope this information should suffice.

Take Care

Regards,
Gaurav Mittal

Amazing Links

Link for babylon dictionary, CAT papers, Idioms and other miscellaneous S/W that is not posted on PaGaLGuy.com

http://esnips.com/web/gaurav-CAT1
http://esnips.com/web/gaurav-CAT


Please Note, that for the following links, if anyone has expired, just go to management paradise (refer to the previous post) and search the forum. I have uploaded most of the files there. You would get all the question papers, mocks, preparation material, etc. there.


CAT 2003 CAT 2004

Cambridge AIO
Link 1

Longman AIO
Link 1

You can also access the above links and many other things at http://bbs.adse.cn/read.php?tid=7518

Britannica Encyclopedia
English Grammar in Use CD-ROM
Longman Dictionary, Cambridge Dictionary, Collin's Thesaurus & others



Do check the CAT thread to get access to more than 200 Mb of CAT material
Materials related to cat, xat and other entrance exams posted here

CAT & GMAT stuff
http://www.managementparadise.com/forums - Link
http://gmatgre.org
http://esnips.com/web/GMATReviewV30Samples

Ebooks? Get access to hundreds of ebooks on Mp.com

Want full version softwares, ebooks, movies, games, music and all?
Goto www.filecatchers.com

Regards,
Gaurav Mittal

Disclaimer: I am not responsible for these links. I found them on the internet and uploading them for the benefit of my friends. If u are the author/publisher of any material in the above links, and have an objection related to their free distribution, please contact me.

After 7 years

I was really thrilled at the prospect of going to Delhi. I hadn’t visited my home town for 7 long years due to the constraints of time and work and it was finally in Dec’2005 that I got the chance. Delhi would have been extremely cold by this time and I didn’t have many woolen clothes with me. However, that was not going to stop me. When I reached the Old Delhi Railway station on 15^th December at 0530 hours, my joy knew no bounds. It was an unusual sense of gratification that I rarely witness.

After a little haggling with the autowallahs, I headed for my home which is in Noida. The morning weather was freaking freezing but I didn’t care even if I catch a cold. The excitement over-powered all. When I reached my home, the sight of each other glorified each other’s faces with an enormous amount of joy. There are no words to express when you see your family after 2 years (my parents were in Chennai earlier)

We chatted, laughed and shared our joys. Homely life is definitely one of best comforts. After that I took some rest and then we chatted again. It seemed as though there was so much to catch on and there were these never-ending talks and the food, ma-ma-mia!

Again, I have no words to describe that… All I can say is what Chandler Bing says in f.r.i.e.n.d.s (Oh… My… God!!)

After wards, we went out to see the newly constructed Akshardham Temple. It was really a marvel. The carving and the fine sculptor is best appreciated when seen personally. The architects had taken care of the minutest details possible, eg. The hair locks of a person, the fine embroidery and even the background lighting.

We visited a number of places in the coming days. There is a full-fledged market called ‘Atta Market’ having a number of malls. One of the biggest malls there was the Centrestage Mall. It was a very big building and the inside was very well kept. I visited my cousins, for the first time at the Pragati Maidan. There had been a remarkable change in them since I saw them last 7 years before. They were all small kids then, but now, I could talk to them as friends. It was a jolly good time, with all the laughing, sharing, enjoying each other’s company and catching up with the past and the recent present.

Every day at home was like a celebration. Next day, I met my childhood buddy, Karan. We talked, laughed, and shared long lost memories. It was really amazing to meet him after such a long time. There has been something really peculiar about us and that is, that we have never ever come to a consensus whenever we argue over a topic. We would keep on discussing on a topic for hours, but have never ever agreed with the other. Everywhere I went, there was so much catching-up to do and very little time! It seemed as though, I was playing a race against time.

Delhi had been completely different from Cochin. The kind of people, their life-style, the environment, the traffic, et al, everything was different. It finally felt nice, to come back to a city where people understand my language and I don’t have to converse with them in broken English or sign language. The other days went very casually… doing small chores for the household like fetching vegetables from the market, bank work, doing stuff here and there, etc. Delhi is not an easy city to live in and its hard life does make a person grow bolder.

The New Year party in the colony was also very nice. A huge stage had been put up with stalls of snacks and dinner by the side. At the centre was a dancing floor. The DJ made the music very groovy and we danced to our hearts content. Although, I didn’t know anyone there except my sis and her friend Lovely (Karan couldn’t come as he was busy ), but I didn’t let that spoil my evening. After hours of dancing and then witnessing a black out we refreshed and then took dinner. The weather was also chilly and the inside-hot and the outside-cold is something which I enjoy. Anyway, it was rather late and by 3 AM we retired for bed.

After a few days, I left for Dehradun to see my grandfather, my paternal uncle and aunt. Needless to say, the joy of seeing them after ages was thrilling. I had a great time there, and along with my cousin, Guddi Didi and sister-in-law, Hema Bhabhi, we chit-chatted and laughed our hearts out as though we were best friends forever. At the same time, I got emotionally welled up after looking at my senile grandfather. He had become really really old and age had signs all over his body. I also utilized this time, to visit all my relatives there.

Next day, I took a trip to Mussorie. The weather was excellent and very romantic .

I walked all by myself from one end of Mussorie (the Library Point) to the other (the Picture Palace), exploring the mall, the hilly terrain and the mountainous view. I also went to see a place called ‘Company Garden’ which was about 4 Kms from ‘Library Point’. I loved to walk and I must have walked some 12-14 Kms that day. The weather and the solitude was very relaxing

I wanted to spend the next few days at home, rather than going anywhere, in order to spend the max time I get with my mom and sis. Another thing was that, I had visited almost all my relatives once and going to Delhi from Noida meant a 3 hour bus ride. So, I just hung around Noida, sometimes, visiting the Atta Market or simply hanging around the 12-22 market (as it is called) next to my colony. Sometimes, we even went to Lajpat Nagar to do some shopping. Though I was totally unaware of the Delhi buses and the twisted Delhi routes, but thanks to my sis, I didn’t have any major problem.

As they say, that all good things do come to an end and so was this. My month-long holiday at Delhi was coming to an end, but not before I celebrated mom and dad’s marriage anniversary on 14^th Jan and also met Karan and his girl friend for one last time. The next day, I had my flight for Cochin at 0635 hrs.

7 dont's after a meal

* Don't smoke- Experiment from experts proves that smoking a cigarette after meal is comparable to smoking 10 cigarettes (chances of cancer is higher)

* Don't eat fruits immediately - Immediately eating fruits after meals will cause stomach to be bloated with air. Therefore take fruit 1-2 hr after meal or 1 hr before meal.

* Don't drink tea - Because tea leaves contain a high content of acid. This substance will cause the Protein content in the food we consume to be hardened thus difficult to digest.

* Don't loosen your belt - Loosening the belt after a meal will easily cause the intestine to be twisted & blocked.

* Don't bathe - Bathing will cause the increase of blood flow to the hands, legs & body thus the amount of blood around the stomach will therefore decrease. This will weaken the digestive system in our stomach.

* Don't walk about - People always say that after a meal walk a hundred steps and you will live till 99. In actual fact this is not true. Walking will cause the digestive system to be unable to absorb the nutrition from the food we intake.

* Don't sleep immediately - The food we intake will not be able to digest properly. Thus will lead to gastric & infection in our intestine.

One Night @Rishikesh

Sometimes life makes u face some really odd situations but, then they themselves are an adventure of a life time! I got such an opportunity when I had gone to Rishikesh to meet one of my best friend’s mom. It was 5^th January 2006 and I started for Rishikesh at around 2:30 p.m. hoping to get there by 4p.m. However, I was able to reach Rishikesh only by 5:30 and then located my friend’s home without many difficulties. We chatted, shared some intimate details and had a great time. Even though, I met her for the first time, I found her company to be very nice.

Now, the thing is that the last bus left Rishikesh for Dehradun by 8:00 p.m. and by the time I reached the bus-stop, after bidding her good-bye, it was slightly above 8 ‘o clock and the last bus had left. I was in a fix as to what shall be done now. The real adventure starts from here. I was totally lonely there and had been to Rishikesh for the first time. There were some taxi-wallahs but they were charging as high as Rs. 600/- to Dehradun. I tried to fix up with an auto-wallah but he was quite reluctant as he didn’t have the proper permit and since it was quite chilly, I would have become a ‘cold duck’ (with everything open in the auto rickshaw)

However, I thought, I would be able to brave the cold and it was just a matter for an hour. Finally, I convinced him by another 50 bucks. Well, it wasn't so bad.. I would still be able to reach my place, although I would have to shell out a couple of hundred bucks extra… But, I guess I assumed that a bit too soon as my luck was not in my favour that night.

Now this guy, made a U-turn into a very dark lane. The road was damn bumpy and i shaking like hell, as though there was some earthquake. There were hardly any lights on the street except for some in the 2-3 houses nearby. So, the autowallah stops and then tells me he needs to get some papers and would be back soon. Well, I found the situation a bit hostile and going out of hand… Even though, I was not afraid of anything, however weird thoughts started coming in my mind. The motive of this guy? He knows I am all alone and totally unknown with the place. It was nearly 9:15 p.m. and getting very cold. To add to it, I didn’t even bring my sweater, was just wearing a jacket (damn! I didn’t know it would be so cold in Rishikesh)

Anyway, I thought that there is nothing much I could do about it. So I called home and told my sister-in-law that I would be back in an hour. Finally, this guy came back with 4-5 other people. At the first sight, I thought, “Gaurav beta, ladne ke liye tayyar ho jao” (Get ready to fight!) Anyway, the guy told me that he was the owner and in this weather he would charge me Rs.800 to take me to D’dun.

I was dumb stuck.. this is pure robbery. But I knew, with the situation at hand, there was nothing much I could do and would have to cave in anyhow. I tried to bargain with him in vain, but no results. I was cold and hungry and hence gave up.. thinking that today, is not really my day. Probably, God has destined me to get ripped off at the hands of this moron! So Amen! Anyway, we started for our journey, yet I was suspicious about this guy. I had to be very vigilant here. He took me to another place and stopped the car. I was a little frustrated at him for stopping the car after every 5 mins, but he said he would be back soon. This place wasn’t so odd as there were houses all around and street lights too. He again made me wait for some 10 minutes and by that time he got the keys of the car and some friends of his for a free ride to D’dun. Damn! Free ride at my expense?

Anyway, we started for the journey. It wasn’t so bad as the car provided a closed environment and I didn’t feel cold any longer. But that one hour was quite taxing as i still couldn't relax. I had to be on my guard till the time, i reach home. However, i tried to concentrate my attention on something else. The driver was not so bad as he was able to drive fast despite a heavy fog outside. He was able to touch D’dun by 10:15 p.m., exactly after an hour as he promised and I got down, after paying him 800 bucks and heaving a sigh of relief that finally I can relax!

Though the incident was a bit scary, but I enjoyed it.. atleast there was an adventure attached to it and so to say, that after associating it with a filmy sequence, I did have the last laugh.

Fun at Merrybrown

This incident happened more than a month back. The day started pretty badly with me having to run around getting my bike fixed and searching for its spare parts, etc etc. Skipping the unnerving details, i would say that it was around 3:30 p.m. and i had been thoroughly exhausted with the day. I was near the main city area (ernakulam) and had a couple of hours before picking up my bike from the workshop and hence decided to check out the latest mall that had sprung up - 'Bay Pride Mall'. It was still under construction but a few shops had opened up, including Merrybrown.

I was thinking that the whole day had been such a mess, so why not just take a chill in the A/C restaurant of Merrybrown. I went inside and was looking at the rate chart.. Everything was so darn expensive and i had no choice. I thought, what the heck! its been a bad day and lemme order something nice to cheer myself up.

So, i ordered the Kung-pao chicken, thinking of trying it out. Now, most of u would be knowing how much quantity Merrybrown would be serving in the plate. Anyway, they were giving a side dish of spring rolls and noodles alongwith it, and hence it wasn't so bad. I began muching the contents quietly and i was about to finish the chicken, when i noticed a dead insect in the plate. I was pretty mad at the mess and showed my disappointment to the manager.

I told him that its the first time i have visited Merrybrown and i am utterly disapponted. The manager tried to defend himself by saying that it was an over-burnt piece of a lettuce or something, but i clearly showed him the insect with all its legs and hands... yuk! Anyway, the manager was a nut-case and readily caved in, to prevent any commotion there.

His sub-ordinate was a very courteous fellow and readily apologized to me a number of times. I was rather impressed by his behaviour, in the manner he owned upto his superior's and his sub-ordinate's mistakes. He requested me to order something else and i decided to try out another variety of chicken, add to it the side dish. So when i got up, i had consumed two plates of chicken, two plates of spring rolls, a plate of fried rice, a plate of noodles and a soft drink for a mere Rs. 110/- (inc taxes) at Merrybrown . It was a sumptuous meal at an extremely good rate!! I actually, found it hard to eat that much, but then who would get such a lucky chance at Merrybrown and then waste food.

Jokes apart, one really gets to witness how these multi-national fast-food corporates handle such situations. For a customer, getting another dish within the same amount might be a big deal, but for them, it hardly matters. The way, the guy owned upto everyone's mistakes, with a smile, even though it was none of his fault, really impressed me with their corporate culture.
Secondly, the place was very well kept yet one can't deny the fact that such incidents will not occur. However, the way they showed their customer-oriented attitude is quite interesting to notice. Quite true as Gandhiji has said that the customer is like God and hence customer satisfaction is the supreme objective.

Finally, i could say that the day was not so bad... 'All's well that end's well'.

A visit to Mr. Nair's House

Few days back, i got an invitation from one of my dad's friend, Mr. Nair, to visit him at his home near Cherthala, which is roughly 30 Kms from where i stay. Although, i wasn't very keen on visiting an unknown person, yet, as he had sent his son to bring me, i agreed. So, began the day and we kept on going and kept on going. I was wondering whether this journey had an end? We reached to a place called Aroor and then after that to a place called 'Kutty Aroor' (kutty means mini) and still the guy kept on driving. That place wasn't very big and I was hoping that, finally i have reached my destination, when he took a cut into a jungle, which seemed more like a graveyard, with lots of kuccha roads and wild greenery and then in the midst of the forest, i saw a house.

Next I met Mr. Nair and we had a little chat, but he was quite a peculiar person, as he would talk a little whenever i initiate a conversation and then there would be silence for a long time, which would be quite awkward. To add to it, he will start singing something, which i won't understand. Next, his son joined us and was telling me about the temperature difference between Kochi and Aroor (i wondered 30 kms and temp. difference...? This is new)
To add to the boredom, the Nair family would engage in personal talks in malayalam, of which i can't make a head or a tail and wouldn't know what to do or say, when they start looking at me in between or laughing.

Anyway, after that me and his son went for a walk outside in the burning sun, although i wasn't very keen on it, but it was just to be courteous to my host. The place was a complete jungle, with no amenities like hospitals or markets nearby. Within few minutes we came back and played carrom (frankly, that was the best part of the whole day!)

So, later on, lunch was served and we munched on rice and sambhar in absolute silence. I was hoping, that i have furnished the requisite formalities and its better to head back. So, on my request, Mr. Nair offered to drop me back... However..

Seems like he had some other plans for me, and we stopped at his brother's residence as well, where i was introduced to his whole family starting from his Amma to his brother and others. It was quite awkward for me to be with these strangers and then pretend to be their acquaintance. I had to give them my complete intro once again and he was talking about some Gautam Buddh Nagar in Delhi (God! there are so many nagars there, how am i supposed to know... Don't they have anything better to talk?)

The most awkward part was when the whole family would be chatting in malayalam and laughing/saying something and i would sit there like a dummy, not knowing what to do or say. The cream of the article was his amma (mother). Being an old lady, she was looking at me with big eyes, as though i am some weird third-world alien. She couldn't even understand my name 'Gaurav' and Mr. Nair had to break it, twist it and even relate it with 'Gauri' to make her understand it. Somehow, in my head, it felt as though she is secretly planning something for me (maybe about getting me betrothed to one of her grand-daughters and binding me to 'mundu-land' forever... Oh God! have mercy on my poor soul )

My impatience and tolerance was reaching its peak, yet i knew my courtesy would make me sit there much longer. Next Mr. Nair's brother asked me to visit his plantation, where he had grown virtually all fruits and vegetables (and i was thinking that uncleji u can open ur own sabzi-mandi right here!). He showed me everything he had done, in great detail and even introduced me to his 7 buffaloes from a distance. Thank God! he didn't actually take me to them and get me familiar with them personally.

He even talked that his brothers and sisters are staying closeby (Sir! don't make me more tensed than i already am!) I was thinking that all these thoughts aren't stupid but a premonition to an awaiting catastrophe.. Maybe Nair family is really working on its way to getting me hitched to them.. (Jantu jalaltu, aayi balaa ko taal tu!) and what made that thought even more certain was that Mr. Nair one said that me and his son are like brothers (Oh, ok! i get the hint )

Finally, i thought, enough is enough.. i told Mr. nair's son that i really really have to make a move now, if u don't mind. So finally, we made a move and he dropped me at the bus stand.
Freedom at last!

p.s. Mr. Nair, no offences to you.. your hospitality was great and i whole-heartedly acknowledge that.

Can you dance?

Are you Wondering whether i would be giving you any dancing tips? Well.. I can't.. because i myself dunno how to dance and that is not why i am writing this blog. I have been one of the sissiest person around who was afraid of talking to girls, afraid of enjoying with the group, afraid to express myself openly,etc. My self-confidence used to fail me when i needed it the most? This so-called fear used to alienate me from the rest and i never had the guts to go back. Isnt that the case with so many of u.. and u do understand what i am saying, isn't it?

But, you know, i have tried (and learned) a lot to set myself free from this fear. Now what i feel is, we care a lot as to how others are watching us... we feel that if we dont do this properly, they will ridicule us, think that we are some kind of nincompoop. But do we ever realise, that we all are human beings and it is the basic nature of human beings to err.. Nobody is made perfect. All of us try to make ourselves better.

Could u say that even a great choreographer like Farah Khan can't make mistakes? Even great singers like Lata Mangeshkar and Kishore Kumar would always sing flawlessly? So, for the lesser mortals, the mistakes are inevitable. The more important point is, how will anyone learn without trying. Unless and untill u overcome that fear, and make yourself join the gang, how could you possibly learn anything. All you need to do is to keep telling yourself, you can do this. Its nothing big.... and what bad would happen even if u goof up! But it sure would give you a confidence to do better next time.

Improvisation is the key to success but what is more important is that you alteast try it.
As they say "A journey to a thousand miles, begins with a single step!" and remember one thing, you would not be the only 'nut'... there would be many others like you out there. But if you don't try, the difference between you and them would be, that even though they too didn't know how to dance, yet they gave it a shot.

And who knows, you might end up discovering a hidden talent in yourself. So don't give a damn about what the others think....

Who cares whether u can dance or not, just step in and rock the dancing floor!!

LOVE... stinks?

Does love really have to be a disease? I am not some guru at it, yet i have heard and tried to solve a number of cases of love-stricken people out of my own common sense.. So how does it happen? Where does the spark come from? How do u manage it? Pretty much like a conundrum...huh!
yet if u have a serious mind, u could achieve that long lasting relationship...

Now i don't have a fixed formula for it.. because it is not like cooking, but love sure does need certain ingredients...

Here i would like to state that i am using 'he' to refer to a person, but should be read as he/she... It is only to make the writing part simpler! This article is a bit lengthy and i hope you would give it a patient reading.

Most of the people out there, see others and fall in love.... Many believe in love at first sight, soul-mate, etc too... Respectfully respecting their sentiments, i feel that the two above are just filmy baatein and are not practical!

To love a person is to treat him with utmost respect and care! To be sensitive and sensible.. It is a very tricky business, but relationships, per se are a complicated thing.. and it is very important to have a knowledge of the moods and behaviour of the opposite sex to lead a happy, comfortable married life.... However, India being a country where, its been taught to refrain from any 'touch' (read: contact) of the opposite sex, people don't really know much on how relationships go about, at first and it is only after a number of fights, disgreements and friction that they learn to co-exist... and sometimes, even that does not happen. But the point under discussion is not to co-exist but to live a happy comfortable with someone, u are truly in love with and this is the puzzling thing - How to find that special someone ....

I would say everything should start with friendship.. because it is one base that teaches u a lot about the opposite sex.. You come close and learn to live and share things... You have fights and make up! Its all within friendship and no big deal! There is no tension or the need to bind... on the contrary, u feel that bond of love for each other.. Its like giving space to each other and at the same time, slowly co-existing in the other's space too (read: in the heart)... It gives u a chance to know the person from inside... because when you are friends with someone, the other person isn't worried about getting committed, rather shows his true self and this is what makes u get attracted to him.... He doesn't have to worry whether he looks attractive to u or not.. There is a sort of freedom in the mind and that's what forms a stronger bond... the more you know the natural outlook of a person, the more you can assess him.. But this needs time... a considerable time and one shouldn't hasten, until he knows the other person inside out... Sometimes, a person's behaviour might be different with a lady-friend and a spouse and hence u need to know the complete story. Patience!, my friend will reward you in a long way!

Getting into a relationship is a big step... and u should be mentally prepared to make some sacrifices, be understanding and flexible... That does not mean u need to give up on ur dignity.. NO. Without dignity and respect, the relationghip will never work. True, u will have disagreements but should have the common sense to make things work.... that is how this 'gaadi' will run. DO NOT become over-possessive of that person, because he is still your friend and you don't want to intrude in his privacy!. Remember one thing, "If u hold love too lightly, it would fly... but if u hold it too tightly, then also, it would die"
You need to have a balanced approach while dealing with ur friend. It will need the input from both of you.. and hence both have to work in accordance with the other and any disagreements to be solved with great patience and understanding.

Some people are really scared at this point at the mere mention of getting hitched.... thinking, the negative effects first... Like getting heart-broken or being hindered from privacy.. but what the heck! this is the reality of life and you would have to face the brunt of relationship even later after marriage and that is something, u can't avoid.. So why not become smart from now and learn to choose ur mate properly.. Why not see what u lack to give what it takes to make a perfect relationship. It is much easier to come out of a nasty relationship rather than a nasty marriage.

The only thing essential here is a clever eye! which means u should be well aware of your friend's personality before making him or her ur *special* friend and it is not so difficult, either.. People, who are seriously commitment-minded would wait long enough to see who is the person who cares and respects them the most! The person who would accept them by their natural charisma and the way they are.. All these things, do not happen in a jiffy, but require a great deal of time and patience.

Now when u have finally decided the person in accordance with your best judgement, which i assume would be your best friend, by now... try to figure out what he feels about u... whether the person thinks that he can give another dimension to the relationship, that he sees everything the way he wants from his spouse, in you... If you can figure that out, then one part of the problem is solved... and if u don't know that, the best way is to ask.. But here... DO NOT get judgemental about the other person.. try to understand his reason. Folks! this is a risky business, and true! love needs luck apart from patience.. But what is more important is that bond of friendship shouldn't be broken, because if he feels that u be-friended him just just to get love, then his trust, upon you, would be completely shattered.. Let him know what ur feelings are and then act sober. If he too cares and thinks ur way, he would come forward to hold ur hand.. Under any circumstances, DO NOT become critical of him and jeopardize your friendship.

Here there is a line, which i want to share with u guys! and it goes like, "If ur love wants to fly, let it... Only if it comes back to you, then its urs" These lines might sound very filmy to some, yet very true!


Even while in a relationship, be sensible... do not become over-demanding or careless.. because both are the perfect ways to make a healthy relationship go bad.. Learn to give each other their space and do not toy with it. Learn to "Give respect, Get respect". Do not become suspicious or bossy. Have trust in ur judgement that ur mate loves u no matter what... Even if u have fights, keep urself under control. Do not let a small matter ruin everything at hand. Try to take it jovially and with broad-mindedness. When thinking about tha matter, take a dual approach. Keep urself in his position and check on his views, what he means to say. If the matter is serious, give urself a small break to get over it... and then come back and talk about it... Talking is the best bet to remove all misconceptions and the best medium to keep a relationship alive and rocking!!
Another thing is, always keep on doing an introspection to know that both of u are going on the right track and that time hasn't pulled the plugs! As they say, "laughter is the best medicine"! Use it to keep the relationship hale and hearty!

Hence, i would like to suggest, reading a book called "Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus" by Stephen R. Covey. The book subtly explains the difference in the nature of men and women and how they react to relationships. I feel that it is a must read for all the couples and they would come to know something awesome about their mates, which they already do not know.... The book can be downloaded from here.


God forbid! u get dumped or somehow the relationship breaks! the wisest thing for you to do is to give urself a break... Keep urself occupied in ur work.. If u understand later that it was ur fault too, try to analyse it and correct urself. If it was ur friend's fault and u know, that the relationship was beyond repair, learn to put urself together and slowly, try to get over with it. Keep urself as engaged as possible so that the tormenting thoughts do not affect u. I know, it is easier said than done! but not impossible..

God has made somebody for you and its just a matter of time, when u meet ur real mate for life! So get over urself and start thinking that, love doesn't stink... on the contrary it is the most beautiful gift that life has gifted us!

With these words, I wish you a very happy life
God Bless U!
*Gaurav*

Recipe For A Wonderful Friendship

1 cup Courtesy
1/2 cup Patience
1/4 cup Forgiveness
2 cups Understanding
1 cup Encouragement
2 tsp. Unselfishness



Stir in a pinch of Praise.
Add a dash of Wit and Humor.
Season with Faith and Conf idence ,
Put it in a 16 x 9 pan, bake on 350° for a Lifetime
and serve with generous portions of Love and Smiles .

Have A Nice Day

Guncha Koi.........

I was just listening to this beautiful piece of Ghazal from Mai, Meri patni aur woh....

the line go like this.....

Guncha koi mere naam kar diya
Guncha koi mere naam kar diyaaa

Saaki ne phirse mera jaam bhar diya
Saaki ne phirse mera jaam bhar diyaaa

Guncha koiiiiiiiii

Tum jaisa koi nahi, is jahan mein
Tum jaisa koi nahi, is jahan meinnn

Subah ko teru zulf ne shaam kar diya
Subah ko teru zulf ne shaam kar diyaaa

Saaki ne phirse mera jaam bhar diyaaaaaaaa
Guncha koiiiiiiiii

Mehfil mein baar baar idhar dekha kiye
Mehfil mein baar baar idhar dekha kiyeee

Aakhon ke jaziron ko mere naam kar diya
Aakhon ke jaziron ko mere naam kar diyaaa

Saaki ne phirse mera jaam bhar diyaaaaaaaa
Guncha koiiiiiiiii

Hosh bekhabar se hue unke bagair
Hosh bekhabar se hue unke bagairrr

Woh jo humse keh naa sake, dil ne keh diya
Woh jo humse keh naa sake, dil ne keh diyaaa

Saaki ne phirse mera jaam bhar diyaaa
Saaki ne phirse mera jaam bhar diyaaaaaaaa

Guncha koi mere naam kar diya
Saaki ne phirse mera jaam bhar diyaaaaaaaa

Guncha koi mere naam kar diyaaaa

Click here to read the review of the movie.....

OSAMA – Life of the people of Afghanistan

Half an hour back, the power went off and so I started with my normal routine, which I normally do at such times…. Chit-chatting with my friend Gaurav Verma… We talk about a lot of stuff from politics to movies, from our university going to dogs to the latest in fashion or cinema…. and so on and so forth…. Incidentally, the topic of discussion came on Taliban and we were discussing about how horrendous the Taliban regime had been on the people of Afghanistan, esp the women…

Most of u would be having an idea of what had occurred in Afghanistan before the US-UK attack… Life was actually terrible there…. Maybe terrible is also a very small word to describe the calamity… but one can easily say that the life of people was even worse than dogs, after seeing a movie called OSAMA…

Its not about Bin-laden, but on the atrocities which the talibanese inflicted on the people of Afghanistan. The movie goes something like this:

In the first scene, the director has shown that the women in Afghanistan are taking mass protests against the Taliban rule… but their procession is brought to an abrupt halt with the Talibanese fighters attacking these helpless women and later jailing them in cells… Very few of them are able to save their lives and flee away…..

In the next scene, a life of a very poor and common household in Afghanistan is shown, where the man of the house had been inducted into the Taliban army to fight in Pakistan and is probably dead and since, women are not allowed to work, the 3 people (a small girl, her mother and her grandmother) are starving…. The mother works in a small hospital, but that too is being shut down since the people have no money to pay… She has no means, whatsoever, to earn her bread.

The condition of the people is bad, so bad that probably death would be a more feasible option than life…. yet they’re somehow managing their lives among fear, terror and hunger. So peculiar are the taliban’s laws that people are not allowed to make any merry… This can be understood from the scene that is shown…. they cater to a house where a marriage is taking place (the bride has never met the groom but the marriage would take place with his photo frame!!) Later they hear a knock and understand that the talibans have come…. So they quickly hide everything and wipe out all traces of joy and happiness and instead cover themselves with burkahs and fake to be sulking over their dead ones!! This shows that the ruthless talibanese were even against the celebration of any joy amongst the people….

The mother later decides to cut her daughter’s hair, so that she would look like a boy and encourages her not to fear and be bold, otherwise all of them would starve to death. Later she takes her to an acquaintance where the girl could work…. For the initial few days, they are able to get their bread, still living among the terror that if the Talibanese discover that, they would ‘kill’ them……

But somehow, the good days are always short-lived. The talibanese begin to induct all young boys to be trained into fighters and so the girl also has to go to the training camp… However, her identity is soon revealed and she is condemned to die… They sentence her to be killed. But then the mullah (or the kazi) comes up to the chief and suggests that the girl be married to him!! A 10-11 years old girl be married to a 60-65 year old man….. and the chief proclaims, that “By the justice of Allah! The girl is forgiven and married to the old kazi”

Later, the kazi brings the girl to her house, where he introduces her to his other wives.. As the readers can now guess, what happens later in this story… the fun, the age, the innocence of a tiny girl being ruined by an old man….. The girl who doesn’t know anything about this world…. is made to suffer for the rest of her life by an old kazi… She is made to be locked in her house where she is condemned to suffer for the rest of her life.

Her dreams are all trampled…. and mercilessly killed….

Such is the pathetic condition of the women in Afghanistan…. They had to survive a climate of hostility and face all odds…. death and destruction… even though they are fully qualified to earn their own bread….. they had to suffer at the hands of meaningless, orthodox talibanese fundamentals….. I know that the US-UK attack on Afghanistan was not legitimate…. But somewhere, in my heart of hearts I feel that it was for good, because it atleast helped to liberate these terror-stricken people…..

May God shower peace on all of us !!

Mera Pyar - Shahrukh Khan

Don’t be misled by the title… I am not talking about myself, I just adore Shahrukh as a very talented actor… but there so many of our feminine lassies who just dream about him with their eyes closed as well as open….!! From their childhood, they have been having fantasies of marrying SRK but its only in their adolescence, they realize that the love of their life has already been engaged in marital vows long long back. But still, that feeling of insane love stretches out and never dies… They seldom realize the fact that in real life, there are ‘No’ shahrukhs… and the kind of romance and personality they see on the silver screen, should be restricted to within those 3 hrs of the movie. But still, they carry that feeling in their gleamy eyes, thinking… ‘Wish Shahrukh was mine!’

This has had some serious consequences as well… Girls get distracted from their normal way of life and get carried into an entirely different world which is pure fantasy and has no correlation with this existing world… Some cases have been so frantic, that such people have been misled into wrong-doings just to get a close-up glimpse of their love God!

Some have been so deep madly in love with him, that they try to find that kind of image in their boy-friends & husbands… without realizing that what they see on the screen is not a real person but only a shadowy image of what should be perceived… They seldom realize that what they have is much better than what they think…

No doubt this is the very idea which prompted Hrishikesh Mukherjee to direct the movie ‘Guddi’ (with Jaya Bacchan, Dharmendra and Utpal Dutt). The movie highlights a girl’s (Jaya Bacchan’s) infatuation towards a celebrity (Dharmendra) and fails to realize that her world couldn’t be completed by an infatuation but by the reality (her fiancé)

But aren’t men a part of a similar infatuation too…. As a matter of fact, we are hit by a very similar infatuation!! Guys and gals dream of shahrukh and bipasha in their mates and they are always submerged in this dreamy world, without opening their eyes for once and realizing that the people who care for them, mean much more than this fantasy…..

Unless one realizes this fact, the words….. ‘pure’, ‘strong’ and ‘meaningful relationship’ are just myth and fantasy!!

Gopal Godse's Interview

I was browsing through Nivedita Raghav's blog, when i came across Gopal Godse's (Nathu Ram Godse's brother) interview....

Check it out.......... Gopal Godse's Interview

Take Care!!

Kuch Panktiyan........

kalam uthaya hua hai magar lafj nahi milta,
jisko dhund rahe hai wo sakhs nahi milta
firte hai hamesha wo jamane ki talash me
bas hamare liye hi unhe waqt nahi milta
-------------------------------------------------------
shaam udaas hai, raat bhi udaas hogi,
subah kafan mein liptee meri laash hogi,
aye mujhe dafnanewale jakar unse keh dena
KABAR par bhi unki tasveer mere saath hogi....
--------------------------------------------------------
Teri har adaa qayaamat se kam nahi
jis dil me basey woh shole se kam nahi

Aaj bhi mohabbat ke woh din yaad hai
teri bahon me do pal khoye bina koi shaam nahi

bichad gayi tu par simat gayi yaadein teri
karun tujhe yaad har pal mera aur koi kaam nahi

jee rahe hai be-sabab yaar maikade mein
gham ko khushi me badal sake aisa koi jaam nahi

main nahi akela tanhaa saara zamaana hai
aahen bhartey hai chup chup kar jinka koi naam nahi

kehtey hai log hua yeh afsana purana
waqt ki nazaakat hai koi ilzaam nahi
-------------------------------------------------------
chalte chalte do musafir mil jate hai,
baton baton mein woh rahi ban jate hai.
do rooh ka milan toh rab karate hai,
par rishte unse samjhauta he karate hai.

jeene ke liye toh ek rahi hi kafe hai,
jo har saans tak saath nibhate hai,
bewafa to woh (jeevan)saathi hai,
jo matlaab nilkte hi haath chhod jate hai.
--------------------------------------------------------
Garmi-ae-hasratein nakaam se jal jaate hain
hum charagon ki tarah shaam se jal jaate hain
shama jis aag mein jalti hai numaish ke liye
hum usi aag mein gum naam se jal jaate hain
jab bhi aata hai tera naam mere naam ke saath
jaane kyun log mere naam se jal jaate hain

Life now and before

I sometimes think of the life of the people of the modern day..... so fast, so hectic.... not a single minute is available to them for leisure.... and i think, where is man going to??

God has given everyone a limited number of years to live, but it seems from day 1, man is in a hurry.... even 2 legs are short for him and wants wings to fly.... Hasn't he done a lot..... invented modern day cars to speed-up transportation, invented cellphones to talk to others.. to save the precious time.... uses computers to speed up his work and carry it out in a jiffy.... yet despite so many gizmos, man is never free of tensions.... is always moving here and there in this competitive world to enahance his individuality, thus making this already competitive world, even more competitve..

I sometimes think about the good old days, when there were no cars, no mobiles, no computers and even no TV.... people used to be hard working, but enjoyed their life as well... They used to work from morning to evening, but enjoying their siesta and then in the evening they would visit the communal gathering or the choupal to crack jokes and enjoy limericks under the trees.... It used to be great where people could discuss their problems and be active in the group.... they had a life and the problems in their lives were comparatively lesser..... But in the modern day world, people are extremely busy with their chores, and seldom get any time to communicate with each other, visit each other....

Another thing is that due to the simple life-style earlier, people used to do labourous work and ate simple food.... but now, with fast moving locomotives, less time to take care of their health, people are more prone to health-related issue like obesity (i don't say that for all.... but on a larger scale).

Where are we going to??? The cities have become so polluted and noisy that even after u reach ur home, the honking of the cars and buses keeps ur ear-drums vibrating.... and u feel as though u will be overcome by mental fatigue... With so many vehicles and much more junta on the road, the cities have become over-crowded and u seldom find even a foot's space to stand....

Sometimes, i feel that the gud ol' days..... are long gone and we are all in a race..... a race for survival, a race for struggle.... where lagging is not an option... but what do u finally win, even if u win... a life spent in winning that race.... that's all !!

Ek Beautiful Love Story - Forever Urs

You have to read this it is absolutely beautiful......

Each year he sent her roses,
and the note would always say,
I love you even more this year,
than last year on this day.
My love for you will always grow,
with every passing year."

She knew this was the last time
that the roses would appear.
She thought, he ordered roses
in advance before this day.
Her loving husband did not know,
that he would pass away.

He always liked to do things early,
way before the time.
Then, if he got too busy,
everything would work out fine.

She trimmed the stems and
placed them in a very special vase.
Then, sat the vase beside
the portrait of his smiling face.

She would sit for hours,
In her husband's favorite chair.
While staring at his picture,
and the roses sitting there.

A year went by, and it was
to live without her mate.
With loneliness and solitude,
that had become her fate.

Then, the very hour,
The doorbell rang, and there
were roses sitting by her door.

She brought the roses in,
and then just looked at them in shock.
Then, went to get the telephone,
to call the florist shop.

The owner answered, and she asked him,
if he would explain, Why would someone would
do this to her, causing her such pain?

"I know your husband passed away,
more than a year ago,"
The owner said,
"I knew you'd call, and you would want to know.
The flowers you received today,
were paid for in advance.
Your husband always planned ahead,
he left nothing to chance.
There is a standing order,
that I have on file down here,
And he has paid, well in advance,
you'll get them every year.

There also is another thing,
that I think you should know,
He wrote a special little card...he did this years ago.
Then, should ever I find out that he's no longer here, that's the card that should be sent to you
the following year."

She thanked him and hung up the phone, her tears now flowing hard.
Her fingers shaking,
as she slowly reached to get the card.

Inside the card, she saw that he had written her a note.
Then, as she stared in total silence,
this is what he wrote...

"Hello my love, I know it's been a year
since I've been gone.
I hope it hasn't been too hard for you to overcome.
I know it must be lonely,
and the pain is very real.

Or if it was the other way,
I know how I would feel.
The love we shared made everything
so beautiful in life.
I loved you more than words can say,
you were the perfect wife.
You were my friend and lover,
you fulfilled my every need.
I know it's only been a year,
but please try not to grieve.

I want you to be happy,
even when you shed your tears.
That is why the roses will be sent to you for years.
When you get these roses,
think of all the happiness that we had together,
and how both of us were blessed.
I have always loved you and
I know I always will.
But, my love, you must go on,
you have some living still.

Please...try to find happiness,
while living out your days.
I know it is not easy,
but I hope you find some ways.

The roses will come every year,
and they will only stop,
When your door's not answered,
when the florist stops to knock.
He will come five times that day,
in case you have gone out.
But after his last visit,
he will know without a doubt!
To take the roses to the place,
where I've instructed him
and place the roses where we are,
together once again.

Sometimes in life, you find a special friend;
Someone who changes your life
just by being part of it.
Someone who makes you laugh
until you can't stop;
Someone who makes you believe
that there really is good in the world.
Someone who convinces you
that there really is an unlocked door
just waiting for you to open it.

Live-in relationships.... for better or for worse

Indians are supposed to be one of the fast changing people who can readily adapt to the western civilization.... atleast that's what can be said about those living in the cities. From fast-moving cars to cellphones to social customs, we have been evolving ourselves into the western way life very rapidly and hence our thinking has also undergone major changes.

For instance, in earlier days arranged marriages used to dominate but later love marriages started taking a strong hold... and have been ever more in dominance than arranged marriages. After this, another concept has overcome people's minds i.e. LIVE-IN RELATIONSHIPS or staying of a boy and girl together in one apartment without marrying...

Actually no-one, can fully condemn or appreciate it because both the sides have their own justifications..
The people who support it say, that it gives the boy and the girl an appropriate chance to understand each other and work out compatibility between themselves. Since the youth of today is so busy in earning its livelihood and stature that the boy and the girl hardly get adeuquate time to know about each other, otherwise and hence when they stay together, they understand each other much more. This doesn't even restrict their freedom because they are not committed to each other... they are just friends who are staying together and if they feel they're compatible, they go ahead with any marriage plans.

Then there is this other side, which is totally against such an idea and dismisses it considering it as hogwash. They feel that staying of a boy and a girl together is against their culture, religion and values and this only encourages unwanted sexual behaviour amongst the two and when they are not bound or committed by any sacred marriage vows, they tend to be free and hence never learn the meaning of commitment and hence call such an idea as a sin.

Well, as for me, i have mixed ideas as i am unable to support any group with full heart. On the one hand, i feel that live-in relationships are not entirely wrong because it does give a lot of time to couples to understand each other and prevents the mistake of marrying a wrong person and thus marring ur happiness.... Also, it enables the fresh blood to understand the responsibilities that they would have after marriage and hence makes them responsible enough to take all of them on their shoulders slowly and steadily.

But on the other hand, i also think that living with anybody (unknown) can also initiate sexual intentions and if one is not careful, the entire episode can be a big disaster. The boy or the girl should be very careful because here they would be dealing with another individual and hence they have to very careful while choosing their flat-mate. A wrong judgement can be catastrophic. They shouldn't forget their values and customs and should always keep in mind that unless they are also mentally bound in a strong, they should just keep their relationship within limits of friendship alone, i.e. to say they should proceed to the next level only if they think that they know each other very well and won’t find any troubles in staying with each other for the rest of their lives.