After 7 years

I was really thrilled at the prospect of going to Delhi. I hadn’t visited my home town for 7 long years due to the constraints of time and work and it was finally in Dec’2005 that I got the chance. Delhi would have been extremely cold by this time and I didn’t have many woolen clothes with me. However, that was not going to stop me. When I reached the Old Delhi Railway station on 15^th December at 0530 hours, my joy knew no bounds. It was an unusual sense of gratification that I rarely witness.

After a little haggling with the autowallahs, I headed for my home which is in Noida. The morning weather was freaking freezing but I didn’t care even if I catch a cold. The excitement over-powered all. When I reached my home, the sight of each other glorified each other’s faces with an enormous amount of joy. There are no words to express when you see your family after 2 years (my parents were in Chennai earlier)

We chatted, laughed and shared our joys. Homely life is definitely one of best comforts. After that I took some rest and then we chatted again. It seemed as though there was so much to catch on and there were these never-ending talks and the food, ma-ma-mia!

Again, I have no words to describe that… All I can say is what Chandler Bing says in f.r.i.e.n.d.s (Oh… My… God!!)

After wards, we went out to see the newly constructed Akshardham Temple. It was really a marvel. The carving and the fine sculptor is best appreciated when seen personally. The architects had taken care of the minutest details possible, eg. The hair locks of a person, the fine embroidery and even the background lighting.

We visited a number of places in the coming days. There is a full-fledged market called ‘Atta Market’ having a number of malls. One of the biggest malls there was the Centrestage Mall. It was a very big building and the inside was very well kept. I visited my cousins, for the first time at the Pragati Maidan. There had been a remarkable change in them since I saw them last 7 years before. They were all small kids then, but now, I could talk to them as friends. It was a jolly good time, with all the laughing, sharing, enjoying each other’s company and catching up with the past and the recent present.

Every day at home was like a celebration. Next day, I met my childhood buddy, Karan. We talked, laughed, and shared long lost memories. It was really amazing to meet him after such a long time. There has been something really peculiar about us and that is, that we have never ever come to a consensus whenever we argue over a topic. We would keep on discussing on a topic for hours, but have never ever agreed with the other. Everywhere I went, there was so much catching-up to do and very little time! It seemed as though, I was playing a race against time.

Delhi had been completely different from Cochin. The kind of people, their life-style, the environment, the traffic, et al, everything was different. It finally felt nice, to come back to a city where people understand my language and I don’t have to converse with them in broken English or sign language. The other days went very casually… doing small chores for the household like fetching vegetables from the market, bank work, doing stuff here and there, etc. Delhi is not an easy city to live in and its hard life does make a person grow bolder.

The New Year party in the colony was also very nice. A huge stage had been put up with stalls of snacks and dinner by the side. At the centre was a dancing floor. The DJ made the music very groovy and we danced to our hearts content. Although, I didn’t know anyone there except my sis and her friend Lovely (Karan couldn’t come as he was busy ), but I didn’t let that spoil my evening. After hours of dancing and then witnessing a black out we refreshed and then took dinner. The weather was also chilly and the inside-hot and the outside-cold is something which I enjoy. Anyway, it was rather late and by 3 AM we retired for bed.

After a few days, I left for Dehradun to see my grandfather, my paternal uncle and aunt. Needless to say, the joy of seeing them after ages was thrilling. I had a great time there, and along with my cousin, Guddi Didi and sister-in-law, Hema Bhabhi, we chit-chatted and laughed our hearts out as though we were best friends forever. At the same time, I got emotionally welled up after looking at my senile grandfather. He had become really really old and age had signs all over his body. I also utilized this time, to visit all my relatives there.

Next day, I took a trip to Mussorie. The weather was excellent and very romantic .

I walked all by myself from one end of Mussorie (the Library Point) to the other (the Picture Palace), exploring the mall, the hilly terrain and the mountainous view. I also went to see a place called ‘Company Garden’ which was about 4 Kms from ‘Library Point’. I loved to walk and I must have walked some 12-14 Kms that day. The weather and the solitude was very relaxing

I wanted to spend the next few days at home, rather than going anywhere, in order to spend the max time I get with my mom and sis. Another thing was that, I had visited almost all my relatives once and going to Delhi from Noida meant a 3 hour bus ride. So, I just hung around Noida, sometimes, visiting the Atta Market or simply hanging around the 12-22 market (as it is called) next to my colony. Sometimes, we even went to Lajpat Nagar to do some shopping. Though I was totally unaware of the Delhi buses and the twisted Delhi routes, but thanks to my sis, I didn’t have any major problem.

As they say, that all good things do come to an end and so was this. My month-long holiday at Delhi was coming to an end, but not before I celebrated mom and dad’s marriage anniversary on 14^th Jan and also met Karan and his girl friend for one last time. The next day, I had my flight for Cochin at 0635 hrs.

7 dont's after a meal

* Don't smoke- Experiment from experts proves that smoking a cigarette after meal is comparable to smoking 10 cigarettes (chances of cancer is higher)

* Don't eat fruits immediately - Immediately eating fruits after meals will cause stomach to be bloated with air. Therefore take fruit 1-2 hr after meal or 1 hr before meal.

* Don't drink tea - Because tea leaves contain a high content of acid. This substance will cause the Protein content in the food we consume to be hardened thus difficult to digest.

* Don't loosen your belt - Loosening the belt after a meal will easily cause the intestine to be twisted & blocked.

* Don't bathe - Bathing will cause the increase of blood flow to the hands, legs & body thus the amount of blood around the stomach will therefore decrease. This will weaken the digestive system in our stomach.

* Don't walk about - People always say that after a meal walk a hundred steps and you will live till 99. In actual fact this is not true. Walking will cause the digestive system to be unable to absorb the nutrition from the food we intake.

* Don't sleep immediately - The food we intake will not be able to digest properly. Thus will lead to gastric & infection in our intestine.

One Night @Rishikesh

Sometimes life makes u face some really odd situations but, then they themselves are an adventure of a life time! I got such an opportunity when I had gone to Rishikesh to meet one of my best friend’s mom. It was 5^th January 2006 and I started for Rishikesh at around 2:30 p.m. hoping to get there by 4p.m. However, I was able to reach Rishikesh only by 5:30 and then located my friend’s home without many difficulties. We chatted, shared some intimate details and had a great time. Even though, I met her for the first time, I found her company to be very nice.

Now, the thing is that the last bus left Rishikesh for Dehradun by 8:00 p.m. and by the time I reached the bus-stop, after bidding her good-bye, it was slightly above 8 ‘o clock and the last bus had left. I was in a fix as to what shall be done now. The real adventure starts from here. I was totally lonely there and had been to Rishikesh for the first time. There were some taxi-wallahs but they were charging as high as Rs. 600/- to Dehradun. I tried to fix up with an auto-wallah but he was quite reluctant as he didn’t have the proper permit and since it was quite chilly, I would have become a ‘cold duck’ (with everything open in the auto rickshaw)

However, I thought, I would be able to brave the cold and it was just a matter for an hour. Finally, I convinced him by another 50 bucks. Well, it wasn't so bad.. I would still be able to reach my place, although I would have to shell out a couple of hundred bucks extra… But, I guess I assumed that a bit too soon as my luck was not in my favour that night.

Now this guy, made a U-turn into a very dark lane. The road was damn bumpy and i shaking like hell, as though there was some earthquake. There were hardly any lights on the street except for some in the 2-3 houses nearby. So, the autowallah stops and then tells me he needs to get some papers and would be back soon. Well, I found the situation a bit hostile and going out of hand… Even though, I was not afraid of anything, however weird thoughts started coming in my mind. The motive of this guy? He knows I am all alone and totally unknown with the place. It was nearly 9:15 p.m. and getting very cold. To add to it, I didn’t even bring my sweater, was just wearing a jacket (damn! I didn’t know it would be so cold in Rishikesh)

Anyway, I thought that there is nothing much I could do about it. So I called home and told my sister-in-law that I would be back in an hour. Finally, this guy came back with 4-5 other people. At the first sight, I thought, “Gaurav beta, ladne ke liye tayyar ho jao” (Get ready to fight!) Anyway, the guy told me that he was the owner and in this weather he would charge me Rs.800 to take me to D’dun.

I was dumb stuck.. this is pure robbery. But I knew, with the situation at hand, there was nothing much I could do and would have to cave in anyhow. I tried to bargain with him in vain, but no results. I was cold and hungry and hence gave up.. thinking that today, is not really my day. Probably, God has destined me to get ripped off at the hands of this moron! So Amen! Anyway, we started for our journey, yet I was suspicious about this guy. I had to be very vigilant here. He took me to another place and stopped the car. I was a little frustrated at him for stopping the car after every 5 mins, but he said he would be back soon. This place wasn’t so odd as there were houses all around and street lights too. He again made me wait for some 10 minutes and by that time he got the keys of the car and some friends of his for a free ride to D’dun. Damn! Free ride at my expense?

Anyway, we started for the journey. It wasn’t so bad as the car provided a closed environment and I didn’t feel cold any longer. But that one hour was quite taxing as i still couldn't relax. I had to be on my guard till the time, i reach home. However, i tried to concentrate my attention on something else. The driver was not so bad as he was able to drive fast despite a heavy fog outside. He was able to touch D’dun by 10:15 p.m., exactly after an hour as he promised and I got down, after paying him 800 bucks and heaving a sigh of relief that finally I can relax!

Though the incident was a bit scary, but I enjoyed it.. atleast there was an adventure attached to it and so to say, that after associating it with a filmy sequence, I did have the last laugh.

Fun at Merrybrown

This incident happened more than a month back. The day started pretty badly with me having to run around getting my bike fixed and searching for its spare parts, etc etc. Skipping the unnerving details, i would say that it was around 3:30 p.m. and i had been thoroughly exhausted with the day. I was near the main city area (ernakulam) and had a couple of hours before picking up my bike from the workshop and hence decided to check out the latest mall that had sprung up - 'Bay Pride Mall'. It was still under construction but a few shops had opened up, including Merrybrown.

I was thinking that the whole day had been such a mess, so why not just take a chill in the A/C restaurant of Merrybrown. I went inside and was looking at the rate chart.. Everything was so darn expensive and i had no choice. I thought, what the heck! its been a bad day and lemme order something nice to cheer myself up.

So, i ordered the Kung-pao chicken, thinking of trying it out. Now, most of u would be knowing how much quantity Merrybrown would be serving in the plate. Anyway, they were giving a side dish of spring rolls and noodles alongwith it, and hence it wasn't so bad. I began muching the contents quietly and i was about to finish the chicken, when i noticed a dead insect in the plate. I was pretty mad at the mess and showed my disappointment to the manager.

I told him that its the first time i have visited Merrybrown and i am utterly disapponted. The manager tried to defend himself by saying that it was an over-burnt piece of a lettuce or something, but i clearly showed him the insect with all its legs and hands... yuk! Anyway, the manager was a nut-case and readily caved in, to prevent any commotion there.

His sub-ordinate was a very courteous fellow and readily apologized to me a number of times. I was rather impressed by his behaviour, in the manner he owned upto his superior's and his sub-ordinate's mistakes. He requested me to order something else and i decided to try out another variety of chicken, add to it the side dish. So when i got up, i had consumed two plates of chicken, two plates of spring rolls, a plate of fried rice, a plate of noodles and a soft drink for a mere Rs. 110/- (inc taxes) at Merrybrown . It was a sumptuous meal at an extremely good rate!! I actually, found it hard to eat that much, but then who would get such a lucky chance at Merrybrown and then waste food.

Jokes apart, one really gets to witness how these multi-national fast-food corporates handle such situations. For a customer, getting another dish within the same amount might be a big deal, but for them, it hardly matters. The way, the guy owned upto everyone's mistakes, with a smile, even though it was none of his fault, really impressed me with their corporate culture.
Secondly, the place was very well kept yet one can't deny the fact that such incidents will not occur. However, the way they showed their customer-oriented attitude is quite interesting to notice. Quite true as Gandhiji has said that the customer is like God and hence customer satisfaction is the supreme objective.

Finally, i could say that the day was not so bad... 'All's well that end's well'.

A visit to Mr. Nair's House

Few days back, i got an invitation from one of my dad's friend, Mr. Nair, to visit him at his home near Cherthala, which is roughly 30 Kms from where i stay. Although, i wasn't very keen on visiting an unknown person, yet, as he had sent his son to bring me, i agreed. So, began the day and we kept on going and kept on going. I was wondering whether this journey had an end? We reached to a place called Aroor and then after that to a place called 'Kutty Aroor' (kutty means mini) and still the guy kept on driving. That place wasn't very big and I was hoping that, finally i have reached my destination, when he took a cut into a jungle, which seemed more like a graveyard, with lots of kuccha roads and wild greenery and then in the midst of the forest, i saw a house.

Next I met Mr. Nair and we had a little chat, but he was quite a peculiar person, as he would talk a little whenever i initiate a conversation and then there would be silence for a long time, which would be quite awkward. To add to it, he will start singing something, which i won't understand. Next, his son joined us and was telling me about the temperature difference between Kochi and Aroor (i wondered 30 kms and temp. difference...? This is new)
To add to the boredom, the Nair family would engage in personal talks in malayalam, of which i can't make a head or a tail and wouldn't know what to do or say, when they start looking at me in between or laughing.

Anyway, after that me and his son went for a walk outside in the burning sun, although i wasn't very keen on it, but it was just to be courteous to my host. The place was a complete jungle, with no amenities like hospitals or markets nearby. Within few minutes we came back and played carrom (frankly, that was the best part of the whole day!)

So, later on, lunch was served and we munched on rice and sambhar in absolute silence. I was hoping, that i have furnished the requisite formalities and its better to head back. So, on my request, Mr. Nair offered to drop me back... However..

Seems like he had some other plans for me, and we stopped at his brother's residence as well, where i was introduced to his whole family starting from his Amma to his brother and others. It was quite awkward for me to be with these strangers and then pretend to be their acquaintance. I had to give them my complete intro once again and he was talking about some Gautam Buddh Nagar in Delhi (God! there are so many nagars there, how am i supposed to know... Don't they have anything better to talk?)

The most awkward part was when the whole family would be chatting in malayalam and laughing/saying something and i would sit there like a dummy, not knowing what to do or say. The cream of the article was his amma (mother). Being an old lady, she was looking at me with big eyes, as though i am some weird third-world alien. She couldn't even understand my name 'Gaurav' and Mr. Nair had to break it, twist it and even relate it with 'Gauri' to make her understand it. Somehow, in my head, it felt as though she is secretly planning something for me (maybe about getting me betrothed to one of her grand-daughters and binding me to 'mundu-land' forever... Oh God! have mercy on my poor soul )

My impatience and tolerance was reaching its peak, yet i knew my courtesy would make me sit there much longer. Next Mr. Nair's brother asked me to visit his plantation, where he had grown virtually all fruits and vegetables (and i was thinking that uncleji u can open ur own sabzi-mandi right here!). He showed me everything he had done, in great detail and even introduced me to his 7 buffaloes from a distance. Thank God! he didn't actually take me to them and get me familiar with them personally.

He even talked that his brothers and sisters are staying closeby (Sir! don't make me more tensed than i already am!) I was thinking that all these thoughts aren't stupid but a premonition to an awaiting catastrophe.. Maybe Nair family is really working on its way to getting me hitched to them.. (Jantu jalaltu, aayi balaa ko taal tu!) and what made that thought even more certain was that Mr. Nair one said that me and his son are like brothers (Oh, ok! i get the hint )

Finally, i thought, enough is enough.. i told Mr. nair's son that i really really have to make a move now, if u don't mind. So finally, we made a move and he dropped me at the bus stand.
Freedom at last!

p.s. Mr. Nair, no offences to you.. your hospitality was great and i whole-heartedly acknowledge that.

Can you dance?

Are you Wondering whether i would be giving you any dancing tips? Well.. I can't.. because i myself dunno how to dance and that is not why i am writing this blog. I have been one of the sissiest person around who was afraid of talking to girls, afraid of enjoying with the group, afraid to express myself openly,etc. My self-confidence used to fail me when i needed it the most? This so-called fear used to alienate me from the rest and i never had the guts to go back. Isnt that the case with so many of u.. and u do understand what i am saying, isn't it?

But, you know, i have tried (and learned) a lot to set myself free from this fear. Now what i feel is, we care a lot as to how others are watching us... we feel that if we dont do this properly, they will ridicule us, think that we are some kind of nincompoop. But do we ever realise, that we all are human beings and it is the basic nature of human beings to err.. Nobody is made perfect. All of us try to make ourselves better.

Could u say that even a great choreographer like Farah Khan can't make mistakes? Even great singers like Lata Mangeshkar and Kishore Kumar would always sing flawlessly? So, for the lesser mortals, the mistakes are inevitable. The more important point is, how will anyone learn without trying. Unless and untill u overcome that fear, and make yourself join the gang, how could you possibly learn anything. All you need to do is to keep telling yourself, you can do this. Its nothing big.... and what bad would happen even if u goof up! But it sure would give you a confidence to do better next time.

Improvisation is the key to success but what is more important is that you alteast try it.
As they say "A journey to a thousand miles, begins with a single step!" and remember one thing, you would not be the only 'nut'... there would be many others like you out there. But if you don't try, the difference between you and them would be, that even though they too didn't know how to dance, yet they gave it a shot.

And who knows, you might end up discovering a hidden talent in yourself. So don't give a damn about what the others think....

Who cares whether u can dance or not, just step in and rock the dancing floor!!

LOVE... stinks?

Does love really have to be a disease? I am not some guru at it, yet i have heard and tried to solve a number of cases of love-stricken people out of my own common sense.. So how does it happen? Where does the spark come from? How do u manage it? Pretty much like a conundrum...huh!
yet if u have a serious mind, u could achieve that long lasting relationship...

Now i don't have a fixed formula for it.. because it is not like cooking, but love sure does need certain ingredients...

Here i would like to state that i am using 'he' to refer to a person, but should be read as he/she... It is only to make the writing part simpler! This article is a bit lengthy and i hope you would give it a patient reading.

Most of the people out there, see others and fall in love.... Many believe in love at first sight, soul-mate, etc too... Respectfully respecting their sentiments, i feel that the two above are just filmy baatein and are not practical!

To love a person is to treat him with utmost respect and care! To be sensitive and sensible.. It is a very tricky business, but relationships, per se are a complicated thing.. and it is very important to have a knowledge of the moods and behaviour of the opposite sex to lead a happy, comfortable married life.... However, India being a country where, its been taught to refrain from any 'touch' (read: contact) of the opposite sex, people don't really know much on how relationships go about, at first and it is only after a number of fights, disgreements and friction that they learn to co-exist... and sometimes, even that does not happen. But the point under discussion is not to co-exist but to live a happy comfortable with someone, u are truly in love with and this is the puzzling thing - How to find that special someone ....

I would say everything should start with friendship.. because it is one base that teaches u a lot about the opposite sex.. You come close and learn to live and share things... You have fights and make up! Its all within friendship and no big deal! There is no tension or the need to bind... on the contrary, u feel that bond of love for each other.. Its like giving space to each other and at the same time, slowly co-existing in the other's space too (read: in the heart)... It gives u a chance to know the person from inside... because when you are friends with someone, the other person isn't worried about getting committed, rather shows his true self and this is what makes u get attracted to him.... He doesn't have to worry whether he looks attractive to u or not.. There is a sort of freedom in the mind and that's what forms a stronger bond... the more you know the natural outlook of a person, the more you can assess him.. But this needs time... a considerable time and one shouldn't hasten, until he knows the other person inside out... Sometimes, a person's behaviour might be different with a lady-friend and a spouse and hence u need to know the complete story. Patience!, my friend will reward you in a long way!

Getting into a relationship is a big step... and u should be mentally prepared to make some sacrifices, be understanding and flexible... That does not mean u need to give up on ur dignity.. NO. Without dignity and respect, the relationghip will never work. True, u will have disagreements but should have the common sense to make things work.... that is how this 'gaadi' will run. DO NOT become over-possessive of that person, because he is still your friend and you don't want to intrude in his privacy!. Remember one thing, "If u hold love too lightly, it would fly... but if u hold it too tightly, then also, it would die"
You need to have a balanced approach while dealing with ur friend. It will need the input from both of you.. and hence both have to work in accordance with the other and any disagreements to be solved with great patience and understanding.

Some people are really scared at this point at the mere mention of getting hitched.... thinking, the negative effects first... Like getting heart-broken or being hindered from privacy.. but what the heck! this is the reality of life and you would have to face the brunt of relationship even later after marriage and that is something, u can't avoid.. So why not become smart from now and learn to choose ur mate properly.. Why not see what u lack to give what it takes to make a perfect relationship. It is much easier to come out of a nasty relationship rather than a nasty marriage.

The only thing essential here is a clever eye! which means u should be well aware of your friend's personality before making him or her ur *special* friend and it is not so difficult, either.. People, who are seriously commitment-minded would wait long enough to see who is the person who cares and respects them the most! The person who would accept them by their natural charisma and the way they are.. All these things, do not happen in a jiffy, but require a great deal of time and patience.

Now when u have finally decided the person in accordance with your best judgement, which i assume would be your best friend, by now... try to figure out what he feels about u... whether the person thinks that he can give another dimension to the relationship, that he sees everything the way he wants from his spouse, in you... If you can figure that out, then one part of the problem is solved... and if u don't know that, the best way is to ask.. But here... DO NOT get judgemental about the other person.. try to understand his reason. Folks! this is a risky business, and true! love needs luck apart from patience.. But what is more important is that bond of friendship shouldn't be broken, because if he feels that u be-friended him just just to get love, then his trust, upon you, would be completely shattered.. Let him know what ur feelings are and then act sober. If he too cares and thinks ur way, he would come forward to hold ur hand.. Under any circumstances, DO NOT become critical of him and jeopardize your friendship.

Here there is a line, which i want to share with u guys! and it goes like, "If ur love wants to fly, let it... Only if it comes back to you, then its urs" These lines might sound very filmy to some, yet very true!


Even while in a relationship, be sensible... do not become over-demanding or careless.. because both are the perfect ways to make a healthy relationship go bad.. Learn to give each other their space and do not toy with it. Learn to "Give respect, Get respect". Do not become suspicious or bossy. Have trust in ur judgement that ur mate loves u no matter what... Even if u have fights, keep urself under control. Do not let a small matter ruin everything at hand. Try to take it jovially and with broad-mindedness. When thinking about tha matter, take a dual approach. Keep urself in his position and check on his views, what he means to say. If the matter is serious, give urself a small break to get over it... and then come back and talk about it... Talking is the best bet to remove all misconceptions and the best medium to keep a relationship alive and rocking!!
Another thing is, always keep on doing an introspection to know that both of u are going on the right track and that time hasn't pulled the plugs! As they say, "laughter is the best medicine"! Use it to keep the relationship hale and hearty!

Hence, i would like to suggest, reading a book called "Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus" by Stephen R. Covey. The book subtly explains the difference in the nature of men and women and how they react to relationships. I feel that it is a must read for all the couples and they would come to know something awesome about their mates, which they already do not know.... The book can be downloaded from here.


God forbid! u get dumped or somehow the relationship breaks! the wisest thing for you to do is to give urself a break... Keep urself occupied in ur work.. If u understand later that it was ur fault too, try to analyse it and correct urself. If it was ur friend's fault and u know, that the relationship was beyond repair, learn to put urself together and slowly, try to get over with it. Keep urself as engaged as possible so that the tormenting thoughts do not affect u. I know, it is easier said than done! but not impossible..

God has made somebody for you and its just a matter of time, when u meet ur real mate for life! So get over urself and start thinking that, love doesn't stink... on the contrary it is the most beautiful gift that life has gifted us!

With these words, I wish you a very happy life
God Bless U!
*Gaurav*

Recipe For A Wonderful Friendship

1 cup Courtesy
1/2 cup Patience
1/4 cup Forgiveness
2 cups Understanding
1 cup Encouragement
2 tsp. Unselfishness



Stir in a pinch of Praise.
Add a dash of Wit and Humor.
Season with Faith and Conf idence ,
Put it in a 16 x 9 pan, bake on 350° for a Lifetime
and serve with generous portions of Love and Smiles .

Have A Nice Day